Friday, 29 April 2016

The Standalone 2 !

More communication from the club ( they are spoiling us aren't they ? )

Finally after hours of doctoring typing up the minutes of The Fans Farce Forum have been published on the club’s website. The redacted reviewed document makes interesting reading ( like hell ! it’s full of stuff and nonsense ).
As a record of a meeting these are about as poor as you’ll ever encounter. Appropriately they’re of Conference standard which seems entirely appropriate as we ready ourselves for a level of football to match. There are no details of the venue, start time, finish time or in what capacity folk are attending.
No minutes of the previous meeting were ever written as it was videod, something we now learn was a one off. Not everyone was comfortable apparently and KM has a desire to save us all 1 hour 30 minutes of video.
The Night Of The Long Tongue will not be repeated which is a blessing in one way as no one wants to witness another vomit-inducing episode from the one who is in relegation denial !
It would appear that a second option of a audio recording is beyond the realms of possibility then ? It’s almost as though they’ve something to hide isn’t it children !
However, it is preferable to the latest output where we seemingly have to fill in the gaps ! I appreciate that minutes aren’t a verbatim record of events but hell, this meeting would have over quicker than one of our recent breaks in play if this is remotely accurate.
It’s not clear where matters arising starts and ends but never mind. POYD is referenced without a word of thanks to the organisers. However, we at least know where sales are at because unlike season tickets this is not deemed commercially sensitive information !
Why the hell is this commercially sensitive ? Who else is selling these tickets that we can’t know how fast they’re flying off the shelves.
It’s a case of filing in the blanks for many items in the minutes. Statements / questions are made requiring an answer but there isn’t one ! In some cases just another comment is put below another statement / question. Guess we’ll never know !
My favourite responses surround the questions as to why so many senior people are leaving and whether it’s anything to do with “ the statement “.
A combination of things and unable to comment on HR matters. The statement was the straw that broke the camel’s back in other words.
It is normal when clubs are relegated for people to look for positions elsewhere. A couple of points here :-
  1. We weren’t relegated when they left
  2. In one case the person concerned had only been in office for a number of days.
  3. In 99% of cases folk don’t leave their jobs unless they’ve another one already lined up or they’re severely pi**ed off.
The item of Communications is another corker where we learn that someone sitting in a dark office doing a copy, paste and send in response to 700 emails shows that there remains a strong bond between the club and its customers supporters and the relationship is good and hasn’t broken down.
Further we learn the Roly spent 1.5 hours chatting to 2 lucky standalone fans at an as yet to be disclosed venue. Whoever you are please make yourselves known and share….we’d all love to know !
Then there’s “ The Statement “ ! Drafted by SMT with input from Roly. Hmmm I thought it was entirely Roly’s work with the SMT ( including former Head of Comms ) very much against. The things you learn eh ?
We go on to discover that Target 20k ( yes, really it still is ! ) whilst tackling the nitty gritty are looking at alternatives to the sofa ! You what ? Apparently discussion around the potential purchase of a chaise longue caused much confusion prompting Tony to ask if he was the Southampton striker. The meeting continued after the guffawing died down and folk wiped up the coffee that had suddenly been expelled via their nostrils.
KM clarified that the club state they want to be competitive in the league as “ we don’t’ want to build up expectations “……….you’re safe there love !
We also learn that the club is not for sale and that no offers have been made or discussed. I don’t know the old rumour mill eh ? I really ought to know better !
Finally…………..” Is owner aware of scale of discontent “ ( this question obviously came from our Asian correspondent Tricia Takanawa ).
To this we learn that “ he is fully appraised “. That explains it all then. If only someone kept him “ fully apprised “ then he’d have a Scooby about what was going on !
Tomorrow sees a battle of the worst owners. Whoever wins the game has surely lost the bragging rights on that one !
Come On You Reds !

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